All mothers (or ladies) go through it every month – an unpleasant time of month when we are uneasy, tired and even in pain. It’s a time when we are on a legitimate break from our Salah, fasting, waking up for Fajr and (wrongfully) recitation of Qur’an as well (why don’t we use our phone’s Qur’an app to continue reading it? Nothing’s wrong with that!). Now if you have young kids – there’s a problem in leaving off all of these acts of worship “abruptly” and “unjustifiably”. There are many mothers who notice that once they are on a “leave” their kids discontinue the daily routine of ‘ibaadah as well and they don’t know how to not let that happen. So, here’s insha’Allah some practical tips for you to follow to keep your kids practicing the ‘ibaadah even as you sit back.
We make sure to make our kids understand the importance of Salah when we remind them repeatedly, “Salah is the most important thing to do!”, “If someone does not pray five times then he is not a Muslim anymore”, “First your prayer, then everything else!”, “Have you prayed your Maghrib yet?” and so on. Yet, on some weird days you lazily sit on your couch as the time for salah passes by leaving your child confused or even disappointed! And you don’t provide any justification because you think that they are too little to understand it? Well, this is how it can be done whether you have daughters or sons or both – simply inform them that on certain days mom is not allowed to pray and that is Allah’s instructions. On those days, choose your eldest one to lead the prayer among your children. Or simply sent them to the masjid with their father. After a couple of months, you will be surprised when they’ll see you not praying and ask “Mom, are you not allowed to pray today?” They got it! Job done! No lying, no twisting, no story-making. Plain truth with a little wisdom.
2. FAJR TIME
If your kids are older, then you must continue to wake them up for salat ul-Fajr (that’s hard when you know that you don’t have to pray). It is important to do that as any break will disrupt their routine making it harder for them to establish the Fajr salah. It’s also a good opportunity for you to recite some Qur’an (on the phone, remember?) and read your daily morning adhkar (remembrance).
Continuing to teach your children their Qur’an lessons is one of the best ways to make your home a continuous place of ‘ibaadah even on “off” days. In fact, you have more time on those days so give that extra time to your kids’ Qur’an memorization sessions. You may also play Qur’an audio on speakers at home and mesmerize as you reflect upon its meanings. Listening to Qur’an increases the believers in Imaan. Keep up with your own reading as well with various Qur’an apps. There’s absolutely no reason to make your home a dead place by abandoning the Qur’an for a week!
Adhkar or remembrance of Allah is the shield of a Muslim. It’s a shield against evil whisperings of the shaytan, your own evil desires, heedlessness and various attacks of the devil. It is also an expression of gratefulness, repentance and admiration of Allah. With adhkar, the action of your heart and tongue alone can bring you immense rewards. Yet, we tend to easily neglect it on such days, whereas these are the days when you need it the most. So, recite heartfelt morning and evening supplications and various remembrances of Allah. As a Muslim mother it should be your morning and evening routine to recite over your kids various supplications for the protection from every evil. See here for list of the supplications to shield your kids from the unseen harms.
5. ‘ILM TIME
A Muslim household is a learning institution. You should have a small Islamic library for your kids (and for yourself) from which you and your kids read daily. This time of the month is probably the best time to snuggle up with your little ones and read an extra story to them. It’s also a fun and confidence boosting activity to give them a chance to narrate their favorite Islamic stories to the family. You may also like to pick up a book which you did not finish reading. Switch between various means of learning – if you are done with a book or are tired then put on some beneficial scholarly audios. If you are child is old enough to understand, listen together.
So, here were some ways in which you can keep yourself and your kids indulged in various acts of worship during your monthly cycle, a period when most of us are neglectful of even those acts of ‘ibaadah which we can or should do. So many sisters feel completely disconnected or even depressed during these periods because they give up everything from their ‘ibaadah routine. But with these simple efforts, insha’Allah our Imaan and good deeds will remain unaffected and we will continue to have a blessed time.